Me: You don't know what it's like to be in my head!
Julie: I don't want to.

Isaac: Harry, you'd better watch your back.
Harry: What? Was that a threat?
Isaac: You'd better watch it... especially when I have my tight pants on.
Harry: Did you see that? He just made a pass at me! That is sexual harassment!


Emily: *referring to her dog* He's a big boy. He'll probably come up to here on you *gestures to her thigh*. But he's really friendly.
Me: Is he one of those butt-sniffing dogs?
Emily: No, he's more like an I-won't-let-you-in kind of dog.

Me: Are you putting on deodorant?
Miranda: Yeah, why?
Me: Ugh. Deodorant is for the weak! This is what a REAL camp armpit smells like! *lifts up armpit*

Robo-Puppy give you sucky-sucky! ~Aaron and Miranda

Please remove your left chesticle from my face immediately. ~Miranda

Me: NAKED PARTY!
Mark: where??????????????

Me: Ugh, I have a headache.
Miranda: Yeah, me too.
Me: I don't know, but maybe there's something going around.
Dan: I've never heard of contagious headaches.
Me: They're called "children".

Tehilla: If I had a superpower, it would be...
Me: A sonic burp?
Tehilla: No, I was thinking something worse.
Miranda: Sonic fart?
Tehilla: No, that would be my dad's superpower.
Me: Uh...
Marissa: A sonic queef?
Tehilla: What's a queef?
Miranda: It's a vagina fart.

Robo-Puppy 2.0: Bigger, faster, stronger, harder, better! ~Aaron

If you stop touching me, I might come! ~Mark

*the day after Miranda was named "a Sexual Tiger*
Dan: Hey there Tiger! What's up?
Miranda: *not getting it* Hey Dan. Wait... you saw that?!
Me: I saw it too! Everyone saw it.
Dan: *laughing*
Me: So Miranda, do you growl?
Miranda: Why yes, I do.
Me: I'm sure you roar, too.
Miranda: Yep!
Me: Do you purr?
Miranda: Damn straight.
Me: I guess purring is better than queefing.
Miranda: Don't say that around the kids!
Me: Just tell them it's a different kind of fart. A very special kind of fart.

Kid: *points to food* Mackenzie, guess what I have in my lunch!
Mackenzie: What?
Kid: A zebra cake!
Mackenzie: Oh, cool. *walks away*
Kid: *pulling on Mackenzie's shirt* Don't worry, it's not made from real zebra!


Gabriel: *pulls up Jason's shirt* You have hair EVERYWHERE!
Jason: Yup.
Gabriel: Do you have hair on your nuts? My dad has hair on his nuts...

Aaron: *splashing under the water* Hey, Sandra!
Sandra: Hey, Aaron!
Aaron: I just went underwater and splashed you in the vagina.
Sandra: I'm gonna get out for a few minutes.

Gabi: *turns around in canoe* Hey, Marissa I see your underwear!
Marissa: *looks down* Those aren't my underwear they're just a part of my shorts...
Noa: I'm wearing Tuesday underwear!
Girls: Ooh! Show us!
Noa: My life jacket is in the way, but we can all show each other our underwear when we get off the canoe!
Marissa: Umm, let's not and say we did...
Gabi: Why?
Marissa: Because, our underwear is a private thing and we should keep it that way.
Gabi: Mine's not private!
Another girl: Well, mine is Gabi, cuz it covers my vagina!
Marissa: Fabulous...